The state we are in during any particular moment powerfully impacts the meaning we assign to something.
Have you ever lost your cool on someone but didn’t mean to? The state you were in was the reason for your action to become upset with that person even though they may have done nothing at all. Developing successful relationships results when a person learns to live life where they and the people around them feel no pain because of emotions. Choosing to feel good tends to form a state of happiness. Just like a muscle your mind needs constant exercise in order to grow. Pushing yourself beyond the limit and that is when you will start to see the growth.
Now if it was that simple everyone would be happy. So let’s begin to understand just how to develop this state of happiness.
Changing state means changing the meaning you link to something. One way that you can change your state is by changing your physiology (movement of your body). Someone who goes for a run everyday will feel more “alive” than the person who sleeps until twelve o’clock every morning. Why? This is because every single emotion you have can be linked back to your physical motion. Emotions send different biochemical impulses to your body which then effect your overall state. More motion results in more emotion.
Think of your state on a level from zero to ten. Ten being unstoppable and zero being terrible. What level are you in at this moment? Learning to live at level ten will overtime lead to the formation of a habit. Having the habit to live at level ten will transform your entire life. The constant state of positivity will not only feed your hunger to get more but also positivity grow the relationships with those around you. The more we measure our level the better we will get at maintaining it.
What we tell ourselves also plays a role in developing a state of happiness. If we hangs what we focus on we can change how we feel. Try not to focus on the the pain of the past because the outcome will never change. Sometimes we think about bad things that haven’t even occured yet which cause our state to change. Why would someone focus on something that hasn’t happened yet? Having faith and courage will allow you to feel the pain of emotions once and then move forward. Try thinking about something that made you happy in the past or something that you are looking forward to. Your brain cannot tell the difference between a real life event and a dream. This means the things we vividly imagine have the same impact on us as the real life experiences we have had.
Certain questions you ask yourself link what type of feeling you will have from an emotion. See, most people act on their emotions the moment they feel it which most of the time results in a negative outcome. Next time this happens ask yourself “What else could this mean”? When asking this you are looking for the deeper meaning that truly drives this emotion. What is this emotion really trying to tell me? It could mean a chance to grow a certain skill or maybe rebuild a broken relationship. Whatever it is be sure to stop and take a minute to ask yourself these questions.
There is no such thing as a negative emotion. All feelings you have are trying to give you the deeper message so that you can evolve your life to the next step. You have the choice to do one of two things when you figure out what an emotion is really trying to tell you.
- Change your perception
- Take action
What makes a negative emotion is when you don’t fully understand the message it is trying to get across to you. The key is to figure out the meaning quick because over time it will begin to get bigger. Don’t make your emotions wrong, appreciate them for what they are and use them to make your life better.
Check out my post “Ways to Deal with Emotions” for more insight on the specific steps to take when creating an emotional breakthrough.